


scAvengers Assemble

by StarSparkle2403



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Archery, Chatting & Messaging, Fluff and Crack, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Irondad, M/M, scavenger hunt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-07
Updated: 2019-11-26
Packaged: 2020-01-05 23:48:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 3,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18376595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarSparkle2403/pseuds/StarSparkle2403
Summary: blackwidowbaby:Clint, what did you do?arrow2theheart:*gasp* im shocked that u would think i did anythingarrow2theheart:but would u be mad if i said i signed us up for a nationwide scavenger hunt?





	1. Scavengers Away!

**arrow2theheart created a chat group.  
arrow2theheart renamed chat:** Scavengers Away!

**arrow2theheart added i_am_ir0nman to the chat!  
** **arrow2theheart added blackwidowbaby to the chat!**  
**arrow2theheart added feelthethunder to the chat!**  
**arrow2theheart added howtoart107 to the chat!**  
**arrow2theheart added gammasci to the chat!**

**i_am_ir0nman:** What the hell is this?  
**i_am_ir0nman:** I don’t know any of you people.

 **howtoart107:** i was thinking the same thing.

 **blackwidowbaby:** Clint, what did you do?

 **arrow2theheart:** *gasp* im shocked that u would think i did anything  
**arrow2theheart:** but would u be mad if i said i signed us up for a nationwide scavenger hunt?

 **blackwidowbaby:** And?

 **arrow2theheart:** i picked random people 2 be on our team  
**arrow2theheart:** don’t be mad!

 **blackwidowbaby:** I’m going to kill you.

 **i_am_ir0nman:** I assume you two know each other?

 **blackwidowbaby:** Unfortunately.

 **arrow2theheart:** im hurt

 **howtoart107:** well, i guess we’re stuck together for the rest of the year.  
**howtoart107:** or until we lose.

 **i_am_ir0nman:** I guess we are.  
**i_am_ir0nman:** At least you chose Brucie-bear, too.

 **gammasci:** I told you to never call me that.

 **i_am_ir0nman:** You love it.

 **gammasci:** I really don’t.

 **feelthethunder:** HELLO NEW FRIENDS!!!

 **i_am_ir0nman:** Umm… 

**howtoart107:** hi?

 **feelthethunder:** I am sorry. My caps lock was on.

 **i_am_ir0nman:** That explains it.

 **arrow2theheart:** ok everyone!  
**arrow2theheart:** now that everyones here we can start

 **blackwidowbaby:** I still don’t like this.

 **arrow2theheart:** oh come on nat!  
**arrow2theheart:** it will be fun!

 **blackwidowbaby:** …  
**blackwidowbaby:** You’re washing Lucky for the next month.

 **arrow2theheart:** the next week

 **blackwidowbaby:** Two weeks.

 **arrow2theheart:** deal

 **blackwidowbaby:** What’s the first thing on the list?

 **arrow2theheart:** a pic from the top of the empire state building

 **howtoart107:** i can get that. i live in New York.

 **arrow2theheart:** you need to have a symbol for our team in the pic too

 **i_am_ir0nman:** What do you mean?

 **arrow2theheart:** we need a symbol ‘cause it means we didnt just get the pics off the internet

 **howtoart107:** i can make one.  
**howtoart107:** what do you guys want it to be?

 **arrow2theheart:** idk

 **i_am_ir0nman:** How about a fancy A?

 **blackwidowbaby:** Why?

 **i_am_ir0nman:** Scavengers minus Sc equals Avengers

 **blackwidowbaby:** That… actually makes sense.

 **howtoart107:** ok  
**howtoart107:** how about this?  
**howtoart107:** _Multimedia Message Sent_

 **i_am_ir0nman:** Did you just draw that?

 **howtoart107:** yeah.

 **i_am_ir0nman:** That’s awesome.

 **gammasci:** I agree with Tony.

 **howtoart107:** it’s not that good.

 **arrow2theheart:** r u kidding? i cant even draw stick figures. ur amazing dude!

 **blackwidowbaby:** For once, Clint’s right.

 **feelthethunder:** IT IS A FANTASTIC DRAWING.  
**feelthethunder:** Damn caps lock.

 **howtoart107:** thanks everyone. i appreciate it.


	2. One Sexy Professor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **i_am_ir0nman:** _Multimedia Message Sent_
> 
>  **arrow2theheart:** damn son  
>  **arrow2theheart:** that is one sexy professor

**arrow2theheart:** so i just learned that we dont have enough people  
 **arrow2theheart:** we need at least eight

 **howtoart107:** i know two guys that didn’t get picked for a team.

 **arrow2theheart:** im down to let them join if everyone else is

 **i_am_ir0nman:** I’m okay with it.

 **gammasci:** Me too.

 **feelthethunder:** The more the merrier!

 **blackwidowbaby:** I reserve judgement until I meet them.

 **howtoart107:** …alright then.

**howtoart107 added w1nterrain to the chat.  
howtoart107 added parafalc0n to the chat.**

**w1nterrain:** what the fuck is this, Stevie?

 **arrow2theheart:** such language! for shame!

 **howtoart107:** Sam, Buck, meet your new scavenger hunt teammates.

 **w1nterrain:** and you didn’t ask me about this before because?

 **parafalc0n:** Ignore the idiot. It’s nice to meet you all. 

**arrow2theheart:** parafalc0n is there any chance the para in your name has something to do with parachutes?

 **parafalc0n:** Um, yeah?

 **arrow2theheart:** good  
 **arrow2theheart:** number 17 on the list is a pic of a team member hang gliding or parachuting

 **w1nterrain:** don’t give him an excuse to go flying  
 **w1nterrain:** he’ll drag me along and that never turns out well

 **parafalc0n:** Oh, be quiet. You’re just scared of heights.

 **w1nterrain:** i’m not scared of heights! 

**parafalc0n:** Then why did you freeze last time?

 **w1nterrain:** i have one arm, you moron! it throws off my balance, you know that!

 **parafalc0n:** Nah, you’re just a scaredy-cat.

 **w1nterrain:** get over here, you prick!

 **parafalc0n:** odneofnwsiinellsne

 **i_am_ir0nman:** What just happened?

 **howtoart107:** Bucky just tackled Sam.  
 **howtoart107:** sorry. winter just tackled falcon.

 **arrow2theheart:** go winter!!!

 **gammasci:** You’re all in the same room?

 **howtoart107:** yep.  
 **howtoart107:** _Multimedia Message Sent_

 **i_am_ir0nman:** Ooo, nice headlock, falcon.

 **arrow2theheart:** nice muscles winter. like damn

 **blackwidowbaby:** Clint.

 **arrow2theheart:** what? cant i appreciate a hot guy when i see one?

 **w1nterrain:** i don’t mind.  
 **w1nterrain:** i’d return the favor if i knew what you looked like, doll.

 **i_am_ir0nman:** Ew. Take your flirting elsewhere.

 **gammasci:** Like you’re one to talk, Tony.  
 **gammasci:** Aren’t you the one that told me that I had the sexy professor look going on?

 **i_am_ir0nman:** You do, Brucie-bear! The students would be all over you!

 **gammasci:** I appreciate that Tony, but you don’t have to lie.

 **i_am_ir0nman:** I’m not lying!  
 **i_am_ir0nman:** _Multimedia Message Sent_

 **arrow2theheart:** damn son  
 **arrow2theheart:** that is one sexy professor

 **i_am_ir0nman:** I know, right?

 **feelthethunder:** I have to agree, Bruce. You are quite handsome.

 **gammasci:** Thanks everyone.

~~~

 **howtoart107:** _Multimedia Message Sent_

 **parafalc0n:** _Multimedia Message Sent_

 **arrow2theheart:** yay!  
 **arrow2theheart:** 2 down a lot to go!

 **w1nterrain:** how many things are in this hunt anyway?

 **arrow2theheart:** a lot


	3. Contagious Caps Lock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **arrow2theheart:** HERE ARE THE ASSIGNMENTS!!  
>  **arrow2theheart:** damn caps lock
> 
>  **i_am_ir0nman:** It’s contagious!

**arrow2theheart:** so theres one other thing i forgot 2 mention 

**blackwidowbaby:** Clint.

 **arrow2theheart:** yes nat?

 **blackwidowbaby:** Tread lightly. Your Nerf arsenal is at stake.

 **arrow2theheart:** not my babies!!!

 **i_am_ir0nman:** Out with it, Birdbrain.

 **arrow2theheart:** some of the things on the list may require all of us being together  
 **arrow2theheart:** like in person

 **gammasci:** Exactly how many of them?

 **arrow2theheart:** at least a quarter of them

 **blackwidowbaby:** Clint.

 **arrow2theheart:** dont hurt me!

 **howtoart107:** don’t hurt him, we need him.

 **arrow2theheart:** yeah! you need me!  
 **arrow2theheart:** that reminds me  
 **arrow2theheart:** nat send the video

 **blackwidowbaby:** I can’t believe you dragged me along to do this.  
 **blackwidowbaby:** _Multimedia Message Sent_

 **w1nterrain:** is that seriously on the list?

 **blackwidowbaby:** Apparently.

 **arrow2theheart:** yup!  
 **arrow2theheart:** number 14: video of a teammate walking through a burger king drive thru and asking for a happy meal

 **arrow2theheart:** the best part is the guy actually ended up calling up the mcdonalds down the street 2 get me my food

 **i_am_ir0nman:** You have no shame.  
 **i_am_ir0nman:** I love it.

 **w1nterrain:** are you like that in bed too?

 **i_am_ir0nman:** Oh come on. Not again.

 **arrow2theheart:** u’ll just have 2 come find out

 **parafalc0n:** Text speak. So sexy.

 **w1nterrain:** shut up, Sam.

~~~

 **pepperpot:** Tony, why are there dozens of drawings of mechanical limbs laying all over the place?

 **i_am_ir0nman:** I got an idea.

 **pepperpot:** Yes, I gathered that.  
 **pepperpot:** But do you have to leave your idea all over the house?

 **i_am_ir0nman:** I have a process.

 **upintheair:** by process, he means mess

 **i_am_ir0nman:** You wound me, Honeybear.

 **upintheair:** you’ll survive

~~~

 **howtoart107:** we should all probably say where we live  
 **howtoart107:** so we can dole out location specific challenges

 **parafalc0n:** Sir, yes sir!

 **w1nterrain:** aye aye Captain

 **howtoart107:** both of you shut it

 **i_am_ir0nman:** Wait, did I miss something here?  
 **i_am_ir0nman:** Steeb is a Captain?

 **w1nterrain:** yup  
 **w1nterrain:** first of our high school football team and then our CO

 **parafalc0n:** Your CO.  
 **parafalc0n:** I never had the pleasure of being under Steve.  
 **parafalc0n:** That came out wrong.

 **arrow2theheart:** did it? did it really?

 **i_am_ir0nman:** This is too good to be true.

**i_am_ir0nman changed howtoart107’s name to moncapitan!**

**moncapitan:** seriously?

 **arrow2theheart:** anyway steebs idea was good  
 **arrow2theheart:** nat and i are in miami right now

 **blackwidowbaby:** We’re going back to DC soon.

 **i_am_ir0nman:** I’m in Malibu. Brucie’s staying with me for a while.

 **feelthethunder:** I AM IN WISCONSIN.  
 **feelthethunder:** Damn caps lock again. >:(

 **gammasci:** Don’t worry. It happens to everyone.

 **feelthethunder:** Thank you, Bruce.

 **w1nterrain:** Sam, Stevie, and i are in New York.

 **moncapitan:** so we have everywhere except the desert.

 **feelthethunder:** I have friends who live in New Mexico.  
 **feelthethunder:** It would be nice to see them again.

 **moncapitan:** so that’s everywhere

 **arrow2theheart:** now for the moment of truth  
 **arrow2theheart:** drum roll please

 **w1nterrain:** no.

 **arrow2theheart:** ok then  
 **arrow2theheart:** HERE ARE THE ASSIGNMENTS!!  
 **arrow2theheart:** damn caps lock

 **i_am_ir0nman:** It’s contagious!  
 **i_am_ir0nman:** RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!  
 **i_am_ir0nman:** Dammit.


	4. Fire Hydrants and Knives

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **arrow2theheart:** we need a picture of a cactus dressed as a nerd and a fire hydrant dressed as a firefighter
> 
>  **w1nterrain:** what the hell is this list?
> 
>  **arrow2theheart:** i dont know man. I dont know

**arrow2theheart:** now seriously. the assignments  
**arrow2theheart:** anyone wanna go scuba diving?

 **i_am_ir0nman:** No can do. Heart condition.

 **arrow2theheart:** nat and i will do that since we’re in miami then

 **moncapitan:** are you ok, Tony?

 **i_am_ir0nman:** I mean, I’m not going to just keel over any moment now.

 **moncapitan:** that’s good.

 **gammasci:** Don’t worry, Steve. I’m keeping an eye on him.

 **i_am_ir0nman:** I don’t need you to watch me. I’m not a kid.

 **gammasci:** Says the guy who put his shirt on backwards.

 **i_am_ir0nman:** Hey! I was distracted!

 **gammasci:** For the last three days?

 **arrow2theheart:** anyway  
**arrow2theheart:** we need a picture of a cactus dressed as a nerd and a fire hydrant dressed as a firefighter

 **w1nterrain:** what the hell is this list?

 **arrow2theheart:** i dont know man. I dont know

~~~

 **pepperpot:** Tony.

 **i_am_ir0nman:** What did I do now?

 **pepperpot:** Nothing. I just wanted to scare you.

 **i_am_ir0nman:** You’re a demon-woman.

 **pepperpot:** Why, thank you!

~~~

 **w1nterrain:** stevie, i like these people.

 **parafalc0n:** Ooo. Grumpy Cat likes someone for once.

 **w1nterrain:** shut up Sam.

 **parafalc0n:** I think he likes one person in particular.

 **moncapitan:** i think so too, Sam. but who could it be?

 **parafalc0n:** I think it might be someone whose name rhymes with Flint.

 **moncapitan:** i think it might be.

 **w1nterrain:** you’re both assholes.

 **moncapitan:** love you too, Buck.

~~~

 **arrow2theheart:** so anyone got their challenge done yet?

 **w1nterrain:** it’s been like four hours. why would we have anything done yet?  
**w1nterrain:** but yes. i do.  
**w1nterrain:** _Multimedia Message Sent_

 **arrow2theheart:** yay! the fire hydrant one!

 **moncapitan:** he didn’t show you the best part.  
**moncapitan:** _Multimedia Message Sent_

 **blackwidowbaby:** You got a firefighter to help you?

 **gammasci:** How did you manage that?

 **parafalc0n:** There was a false alarm a couple blocks over, and the firefighters were on their way back and saw us.

 **w1nterrain:** i thought we were in for it, but they just thought it was funny.

 **parafalc0n:** They did make sure we took the stuff off of it afterward, though.

 **arrow2theheart:** why do you guys get all the fun?  
**arrow2theheart:** i tried to dress a hydrant and got arrested

 **w1nterrain:** you what?!?!

 **blackwidowbaby:** It happens all the time. I just bail him out and he buys me knives as payment.

 **moncapitan:** knives?

 **arrow2theheart:** yeah. the expensive kind

 **i_am_ir0nman:** I don’t think I’ve ever been this terrified of someone I’ve never met before.

 **blackwidowbaby:** :)


	5. Pen-E

**arrow2theheart:** nat i hurt 

**blackwidowbaby:** That’s your fault, not mine.

 **w1nterrain:** what happened?

 **blackwidowbaby:** He fell asleep on the beach after we went scuba diving for this stupid hunt.

 **arrow2theheart:** im burnt all over  
 **arrow2theheart:** it hurts to type

 **moncapitan:** ouch. i know how that feels.

 **w1nterrain:** hey, Stevie. you remember that time you couldn’t sit down cause you got burnt on your ass?

 **moncapitan:** i told you never to speak of that again.

 **i_am_ir0nman:** Do continue, Snowflake.

 **w1nterrain:** snowflake?

**parafalc0n changed w1nterrain’s name to snowflake!**

**snowflake:** what the hell, Sam.

**snowflake changed parafalc0n’s name to chairForce!**

**chairForce:** Okay, that’s just mean.

 **snowflake:** all’s fair in chats and naming

 **chairForce:** That doesn’t even make sense.

~~~

 **feelthethunder:** I HAVE THE CACTUS PICTURE!  
 **feelthethunder:** Not again.  
 **feelthethunder:** _Multimedia Message Sent_

 **gammasci:** Hey, Tony. I found your twin.  
 **gammasci:** It’s annoyingly prickly, but soft and squishy on the inside.  
 **gammasci:** And you have the same glasses.

 **i_am_ir0nman:** Shut the hell up.

**moncapitan changed i_am_ir0nman’s name to ir0nnerd!**

**ir0nnerd:** …  
 **ir0nnerd:** I thought you were better than this, Steeb.

 **moncapitan:** payback’s a bitch, Tony.

~~~

 **gammasci:** Tony, what is this?  
 **gammasci:** _Multimedia Message Sent_

 **ir0nnerd:** What do you mean?

 **gammasci:** Why is it on my desk?

 **ir0nnerd:** Her name is Pen-E.

 **gammasci:** Really, Tony?

 **ir0nnerd:** I let Dum-E name her, okay?  
 **ir0nnerd:** I thought you might want someone to keep you company when you won’t let me in your lab.

 **gammasci:** … She is pretty cute.

~~~

 **arrow2theheart:** i forgot 2 send the picture we took  
 **arrow2theheart:** _Multimedia Message Sent_

 **moncapitan:** that’s absolutely gorgeous.

 **ir0nnerd:** You know what else is gorgeous? This beauty.  
 **ir0nnerd:** _Multimedia Message Sent_

 **snowflake:** is that a 1946 Triumph 1800 Roadster?

 **ir0nnerd:** Yep. You like?

 **snowflake:** hell yeah.

 **arrow2theheart:** do u have any more of those?

 **ir0nnerd:** Old cars? Yeah, a few.

 **arrow2theheart:** can you get another picture of them?  
 **arrow2theheart:** we get extra points for every car in the pic

 **gammasci:** Oh, here we go.

 **ir0nnerd:** Here, is this one better?  
 **ir0nnerd:** _Multimedia Message Sent_

 **snowflake:** there’s got to be at least fifty cars there. what the hell, Tony?

 **gammasci:** *sighs* That’s not even half of them.  
 **gammasci:/** He has an obsession.

 **ir0nnerd:** It’s not an obsession!  
 **ir0nnerd:** That is the history of the world in car form!

 **gammasci:** Okay, maybe the cars aren’t an obsession, but what would you call the robots?

 **moncapitan:** what robots?

 **gammasci:** _Multimedia Message Sent_

 **arrow2theheart:** omg theyre adorable!

 **ir0nnerd:** :D They’re my babies.  
 **ir0nnerd:** Brucie! Show them the new girl!

 **gammasci:** Why can’t you show them? You’re the one that made her.

 **ir0nnerd:** Yes, but she’s in your custody now.

 **gammasci:** You’re ridiculous.  
 **gammasci:** _Multimedia Message Sent_

 **arrow2theheart:** shes even cuter!!!!!

 **moncapitan:** what’s her name?

 **ir0nnerd:** Pen-E. I let one of the other bots name her.

 **moncapitan:** that’s adorable.

 **snowflake:** Stevie was right, Tony. you are a nerd.


	6. Children

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **snowflake:** wait wait wait  
>  **snowflake:** what was that about pole dancing?
> 
>  **chairForce:** This list just keeps getting weirder and weirder.

**moncapitan:** so what else is on the list?

 **arrow2theheart:** a pic of as many generations as you can find, pic of a teammate pole dancing on a street sign, pic of 2 squirrels fighting over a nut…

 **snowflake:** wait wait wait  
 **snowflake:** what was that about pole dancing?

 **chairForce:** This list just keeps getting weirder and weirder.

~~~

 **moncapitan:** are you thinking what i’m thinking?

 **chairForce:** Barnes family meeting?

 **moncapitan:** Barnes family meeting.

 **snowflake:** what why?

 **chairForce:** who else do we know that has a lot of generations in their family?

 **snowflake:** oh no. we are not dragging my family into this

 **moncapitan:** yes, we are. besides, your mom loves me.

~~~

 **pepperpot:** Tony, why is there a tiny robot on my desk?

 **ir0nnerd:** I don’t know what you mean.

 **pepperpot:** There is a small, spherical robot on my desk. Why?

 **ir0nnerd:** One, her name is Susie, and two, I broke the spinny thing you had.

 **pepperpot:** So you decided to replace it with a sentient being.

 **ir0nnerd:** Susie is more than a sentient being, Pep. She’s a child, and now she’s yours.

 **pepperpot:** You gave me a child.

 **ir0nnerd:** You’ve always said you wanted kids, but are too busy for a relationship. Susie just needs attention, nothing more.

 **pepperpot:** …   
**pepperpot:** Thank you, Tony.

~~~

 **ir0nnerd:** _Multimedia Message Sent_

 **arrow2theheart:** yay! the pic of the skirrels!

 **chairForce:** Skirrels?

 **gammasci:** When did you take that? You haven’t left the house in the last week.

 **ir0nnerd:** Peter took it.

 **gammasci:** Ah.

 **moncapitan:** Peter?

 **ir0nnerd:** My son.

 **arrow2theheart:** u have a kid?

 **ir0nnerd:** I do.

 **gammasci:** You guys can’t see him, but he’s grinning so hard right now.

**arrow2theheart changed ir0nnerd’s name to ir0ndad!**

**ir0ndad:** I’m okay with this.

~~~

 **snowflake:** why do you always try to embarrass me?

 **moncapitan:** it’s just so much fun.

 **snowflake:** that doesn’t mean you have to say i have a crush in the middle of family dinner

 **moncapitan:** they deserve to know.

 **snowflake:** my mom has already started sending me pictures of wedding venues  
 **snowflake:** she’s asking me when she’ll have grandkids

 **moncapitan:** how horrible.

 **snowflake:** shut up. i can hear you laughing.  
 **snowflake:** if you don’t stop i’m coming in there  
 **snowflake:** alright, you asked for it

 **moncapitan:** nonono i’ll stop  
 **moncapitan:** Buck, no  
 **moncapitan:** krmf0e94jnermf


	7. Pole Dancing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **blackwidowbaby:** Clint got arrested again.

**moncapitan:** _Multimedia Message Sent_

 **arrow2theheart:** geez how many generations is that?

 **snowflake:** five  
 **snowflake:** be glad my great-grandma lives in the city still

 **arrow2theheart:** i am man, i am

~~~

“This is such a bad idea.”

“Oh, come on! It’ll be fun!”

“I’m just here to watch you crash and burn.”

“I’ll be fine. Just make me look good.”

“Don’t get arrested again, idiot.”

“I won’t.”

~~~

 **blackwidowbaby:** Clint got arrested again.

 **moncapitan:** what did he do?

 **blackwidowbaby:** _Multimedia Message Sent_

 **ir0ndad:** He seriously pole danced on a street sign?

 **snowflake:** look at those arms   
**snowflake:** o.o

 **chairForce:** Hot damn.

 **snowflake:** back off, Sam.

 **ir0ndad:** Now ladies, you’re both pretty.

 **snowflake:** shut up

 **chairForce:** Shut up.

~~~

 **arrow2theheart:** so i hear u like my arms

 **snowflake:** i do

 **arrow2theheart:** not surprising. everyone does

 **snowflake:** i can see why.

~~~

 **arrow2theheart:** im out!

 **moncapitan:** that’s good.

 **arrow2theheart:** i thought u werent going 2 bail me out anymore Nat

 **blackwidowbaby:** I didn’t.

 **arrow2theheart:** wat

 **gammasci:** Tony.

 **ir0ndad:** What?

 **gammasci:** What did you do.

 **ir0ndad:** I did nothing.

 **gammasci:** Tony.

 **ir0ndad:** Okay, fine. I did it.

 **arrow2theheart:** wat

 **moncapitan:** how?

 **ir0ndad:** I have some sway in DC.

 **gammasci:** More like they’re scared of you.

 **ir0ndad:** That too.

 **arrow2theheart:** im so confused


	8. Steve And Bucky Are Broken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **moncapitan:** guh.
> 
>  **snowflake:** stevie’s brain just melted.

**arrow2theheart:** no seriously. how did you get me out?

 **ir0ndad:** That is a state secret, my friend.

 **gammasci:** He hacked the DC police’s servers and installed a program that made the screen of every computer flash a picture of Grumpy Cat each time the letter ‘e’ was typed.

 **ir0ndad:** Traitor.

 **moncapitan:** guh.

 **snowflake:** stevie’s brain just melted.

 **arrow2theheart:** thats badass Tony

 **blackwidowbaby:** I’m impressed.

 **arrow2theheart:** *le gasp* Nat’s showing emotion!!!

 **blackwidowbaby:** Shut it, Hawkguy.

 **arrow2theheart:** hey!

 **snowflake:** hawkguy?

 **blackwidowbaby:** The little kids in his archery classes call him Hawkeye, and he hates it when people call him Hawkguy instead.  
 **blackwidowbaby:** Speaking of which…

**blackwidowbaby changed arrow2theheart’s name to hawkguy!**

**hawkguy:** u r no longer my best friend

 **blackwidowbaby:** Get out of my house, then.

 **hawkguy:** nooooooo, Nat i love youuuuu!!!

 **blackwidowbaby:** I love you, too.

 **hawkguy:** yay!

 **ir0ndad:** Awwww. That’s adorable.

 **blackwidowbaby:** Shut it, Tony. I know where you live.

 **hawkguy:** she really does

 **ir0ndad:** Now I’m even more scared of you.

 **blackwidowbaby:** :)

~~~

 **snowflake:** have you recovered yet, Stevie?

 **moncapitan:** guh.

 **chairForce:** Are you alright, man?

 **moncapitan:** guh.

 **snowflake:** i think Tony broke him.

 **chairForce:** I think you’re right.  
 **chairForce:** How about you? Have you forgotten that Clint teaches archery to small children?

 **snowflake:** …   
**snowflake:** yes, i had.

 **chairForce:** Do you need a minute?

 **snowflake:** yes. yes i do.

~~~

 **chairForce:** Steve and Bucky won’t be back for a while.

 **ir0ndad:** Why?

 **chairForce:** You and Clint broke them.

 **hawkguy:** wat? i didnt do anything!

 **chairForce:** Tony proved how smart he is and Steve thinks smart people are sexy.  
 **chairForce:** And Bucky’s brain melted at the thought of Clint teaching children.

 **hawkguy:** rlly?

 **ir0ndad:** Huh.


	9. Trickshot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **hawkguy:** anyway. theres a trickshot challenge!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> 
>  **blackwidowbaby:** Oh, no.
> 
>  **hawkguy:** *deep breath*  
>  **hawkguy:** YAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!

**hawkguy:** guess what!

 **snowflake:** what?

 **hawkguy:** oh! ur back!  
 **hawkguy:** anyway. theres a trickshot challenge!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 **blackwidowbaby:** Oh, no.

 **hawkguy:** *deep breath*  
 **hawkguy:** YAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!

 **feelthethunder:** Why is this a bad thing? We want more points, correct?

 **blackwidowbaby:** Clint thinks of himself as the trickshot king.

 **snowflake:** really?

 **blackwidowbaby:** Really.

 **hawkguy:** come on Nat! lets go video some!

 **blackwidowbaby:** *sigh*

~~~

 _Multimedia Message_   
_Sent 7:37 pm_

A man is standing in the middle of an open archery range, a quiver of arrows strapped to his back and a bow in his hand. A basketball is sitting at his feet. It is obvious he has been training for a while, sweat creating a sheen across his forehead and making his tight purple t-shirt cling to broad shoulders.

“Is it running?” he asks eagerly, blue eyes glowing with excitement.

“Yes, Clint, it’s running,” an exasperated female voice replies. “Just go.”

The man grins and picks up the basketball. “Middle target,” he says, then throws it at the ceiling and it ricochets off a support beam toward a wall. It bounces off the wall and back toward a line of targets affixed to the back wall.

In a blink of an eye, the man has an arrow nocked and has let it fly. The arrow skewers the basketball and attaches it to the middle target.

The man turns to the camera and winks.

~~~

 **snowflake:** Clint.

 **hawkguy:** yes, Bucky?

 **snowflake:** warn me next time you send a video like that, ok?

 **hawkguy:** why would i do that?

 **snowflake:** because you almost gave me a heart attack from your sheer hotness.

~~~

Two minutes later.

 **snowflake:** Clint?

~~~

 **hawkguy:** NAAAAAAT!!!!!!

 **blackwidowbaby:** What now?

 **hawkguy:** Bucky called me hot!

 **blackwidowbaby:** And why is this a problem? People call you hot all the time.

 **hawkguy:** …   
**hawkguy:** cause i actually like him

 **blackwidowbaby:** Then tell him.

~~~

 **hawkguy:** hi

 **snowflake:** well hello. you disappeared for quite a while there.

 **hawkguy:** i was having a crisis

 **snowflake:** what kind of crisis?

 **hawkguy:** the kind where a rlly great guy calls u hot and u freak out cause u like him and dont know what to say

 **snowflake:** oh.  
 **snowflake:** excuse me for a second.

~~~

 **snowflake:** STEEEEEEVE!!!!!

 **moncapitan:** what?

 **snowflake:** Clint said that he likes me!!!!

 **moncapitan:** what are you talking to me for then? go tell him how you feel.

~~~

 **snowflake:** hi.

 **hawkguy:** sooooooo what was that about

 **snowflake:** i was having my own freak out.

 **hawkguy:** oh.  
 **hawkguy:** sooo now what?

 **snowflake:** you have Facetime?

 **hawkguy:** yeah?

 **snowflake:** wanna go on a date? 

**hawkguy:** hell yeah.


End file.
